Parenting could be something stressful that will drain your thought and energy. Please change your mind if you think that raising kids is only Mom’s job. Child-Rearing is something that you should do together with the partner. Both Mom and Dad should back up each other to raise the children no matter what even though the Dad has to do 9 to 5 daily jobs, he still responsible to give time and affection to his children. Meanwhile Mom, which maybe has more time at home, also deserves a break to keep the stress away. This is where Dad takes part in raising the kids even though it is just a small task. In short, parenting is the art that will strengthen the bond of wife and husband through children.
To make it work, you need to make sure that you and your partner have something in common when it comes to parenting styles. It’s important because it will determine how you raise the kids the way that you want. Just in case you have no idea about parenting styles, there are 4 types of parenting styles that you need to know, such as Disciplinarian, Permissive Parenting, Uninvolved, and Authoritative. Of course, each of them has advantages and drawbacks that will affect the kids in the future. So please choose the type of parenting style that is suitable for your preference.
Pros and Cons Permissive Parenting
In this article, we will discuss the pros and cons of Permissive Parenting which is very common nowadays. Let’s dig deeper so you have a glimpse of the permissive parent style.
Permissive parenting is one of the most popular parenting styles that emphasize the freedom for the kids. It doesn’t mean that you let the kids do what they want to do. There are only a few guidelines and rules but the parents don’t expect any mature behavior. The parents positioned themselves as a friend instead of Mom or Dad. The parents will not dictate every move or decide every action that needs to be done, this parenting style offers more freedom so the kids can decide what they want and do what they need as long as it doesn’t break the principle. On a particular event, you are not enforcing the kids to do something but you are involved in their actions, just like what friends do each other.
Those treatments will make the kids open to their parents and as a result, it is easy to communicate everything with them. And yes, permissive parenting is very nurturing and loving as the relationship between the kids and the parents are in good condition. Even when you tell the rules and guidelines, the kids will understand as both participants have great communications. Sometimes the parents won’t tell them about the exact rules and they will let the kids figure it out. At some points, the children can decide for themselves because the parents will not give any directions.
Some people think that the permissive parenting style is not a great way of raising the kids. Moreover, the researchers also found that this approach leads to a series of negative outcomes. Here’s the list of what might happen to a child that is raised with a permissive parenting style.
Low Achievement in Academic
The research shows that the kids might have lower academic achievement due to lack of expectations since they were young. They didn’t have something to strive and there was no encouragement from the parents either.
In a long time, when the kids become adolescent they tend to be a poor decision-maker since the parents didn’t give any directions or guidelines for what they should be done. Freedom is good but when the kids don’t have any strict rules that help them to make decisions, it could be a nightmare in the future.
Less Emotional Understanding
Kids that are raised with permissive parenting tend to get everything they want. So when the didn’t get what they wanted, the kids could show aggression and couldn’t hold their anger. The outcome also linked with less emotional understanding because their parents always provide what they asked.
Higher Chance to Do Drugs and Alcoholic
As they don’t have any emotional understanding, the kids tend to try something that can relieve their emotions. Studies suggest that the kids that struggle with emotional problems have a higher chance to do drugs or being alcoholic in the future.
They Don’t Have Habit
The freedom that they have let the kids do what they want without thinking about the limits. As a result, it is hard for them to build a habit even though it is just a small task, such as eating, playing, or studying. They just want to do what they think is fun and when they don’t like it, they will show resistance or aggression.
I didn’t say that permissive parenting is bad for any parent as I showed you the facts based on researchers and studies. As I mentioned earlier, each parenting style has advantages and drawbacks. The permissive style is good and it is okay if you take the parts that you think fit with your principle. You just need a few modifications so you can use different approaches that will complement the permissive style, such as setting expectations and goals that need to be achieved so the kids will build habits that help them to find the way to reach the goals.
Think about punishment and reward so the kids will understand the limit and the honor they possibly get when they do a particular action. That way you can help them to think about which one is good and bad for themselves instead of wandering with no clue at all. Those are the conclusions that we hope will help you to find the right path of parenting style. Other than that, don’t forget to always show your affections to the kids!